Have you finally orgasmed yet?
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
