Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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