took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
