forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
