That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
