I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
