i just google imaged poop.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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