To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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