I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
