This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
You left your underwear on the fireplace
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
