And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
