school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
we're so committed to being not committed
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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