Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
