Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize