I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize