the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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