escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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