I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
