i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
