OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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