Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize