I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Randomize
