Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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