Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I want her autograph on my taint
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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