Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
