im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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