I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize