How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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