It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
