Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
