TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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