wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize