Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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