its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
