her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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