I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
