laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize