People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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