You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
