Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Randomize
