I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
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