I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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