kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize