Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
