very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
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