i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize