don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
