Cold hands, warm shart.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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