ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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