if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
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